What is an INFJ?

I’ve discussed introversion quite a bit on my blog, but today I want to get a little more specific and talk about INFJs.

For anyone who doesn’t already know, the INFJ is one of the sixteen personality types in the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). Back around 2006, I initially thought I was the ISFJ and then maybe the INFP, but I eventually concluded that the INFJ is more appropriate. I’m not sure how reliable or valid the MBTI really is, and I don’t pay any attention to its accuracy. I simply love that it allows us to put a label on our personality and helps us to understand ourselves better than we ever have. When I learn more about my personality type, I often think to myself, “So maybe that’s why I do that sometimes! Maybe I’m not the biggest weirdo after all.” I believe it’s a good tool for understanding our preferences and helps assure us that some of our quirks and behaviors may not be as odd as we originally thought.

A few of you who are reading this might also be INFJs, so I thought it’d be a good idea to share a collection of images, quotes, descriptions, links, etc. that you might find interesting and applicable to your personality style.

Some interesting links:

Top 10 Things Every INFJ Wants You to Know

Career advice for INFJs

Humorous description of MBTI types

The INFJ Coach blog

INFJoe’s blog

INFJ Problems

The INFJ Den

So accurate! I call myself the introverted misanthrope, yet I am pursuing a career in social work to help others.

This one applies 100% to my personality. I call myself the introverted misanthrope, yet I am pursuing a career in social work to help others. I think INFJs can be very contradictory. We see people’s true potential and want to help them become their best, but we can also become very negative and discouraged when people don’t live up to our high standards. I have this thing where I enjoy helping individuals, but I often hate society and think it’s made up of a bunch of hopeless idiots.

I bet lots of people feel this way, but I think being an INFJ makes us feel even weirder at times.

I bet lots of people feel this way, but I think being an INFJ makes us feel even weirder at times. Based on the estimates, INFJ is considered the rarest personality type.

Again, us INFJ's often feel a strong desire to help others, and it can often be reflected in the careers we choose.

As I mentioned earlier, INFJs tend to feel a strong desire to help others, and it can often be reflected in the careers we choose. Ideal careers include a therapist/counselor, artist, writer, doctor, teacher, environmentalist, musician, child care worker, and librarian.

This may explain why I never connect with my classmates or coworkers and always feel like the loner. As soon as I begin to know someone, I usually get bored, annoyed, or disgusted by who they really are. My boyfriend is the rare exception, which is why I value our relationship so much.

Very true for me. I rarely connect with classmates/coworkers and end up feeling like the loner almost everywhere I go. It really can be a lonely experience to be an INFJ. As soon as I begin to know someone, I usually feel bored, annoyed, or repulsed by who they really are and am ready to be by myself again. Most often, my interests, outlook, and style of communication simply don’t mesh well with others. My boyfriend is the rare exception, which is why I value our relationship so much. When someone like my boyfriend comes along and actually “gets me”, it seems like a miracle has occurred. It gives me hope that there are a few people in the world who can understand and appreciate me.

I really resonate with this. When I seek a relationship or friendship with someone, I want it to be deep and real. I don't want to talk about superficial things all the time or bother with people who don't share their honest thoughts and feelings.

I really resonate with this. When I seek a relationship or friendship with someone, I want it to be deep and real pretty much from the beginning. I need someone I can really talk to and be able to rely upon. I don’t want to talk about superficial things all the time or bother with people who won’t share their honest thoughts and feelings. I’m easily bored by people who want to talk about food, sports, or tv shows and those who only want to hang out once in a while. When I like someone, I’m ready to put all I’ve got into it, but that person better be ready to do the same or else the relationship will eventually fail.

Many people might relate to this. I don't talk to most people I encounter, but I come across as friendly and polite to those whom I can tolerate. It's actually quite rare for me to like someone. And when that happens, I tend to have very high expectations of that person.

Many people might relate with this. I don’t talk to most people I encounter, but I come across as friendly and polite to those whom I can tolerate. I’m not as cold or unfriendly as I might make myself sound. It’s just quite rare for me to like someone enough that I’ll begin spending my free time with them. And when that happens, I tend to have very high expectations of that person.

I think this is really good advice for INFJs. It's great to be future-oriented and have goals, but I tend to get extremely upset if something prevents me from following through with my original plan. We might reduce some of our stress and anxiety if we can learn to live more in  the present and become less fixated on our future plans.

I think this is really good advice for INFJs. It’s great to be future-oriented and have goals, but I tend to get extremely upset and frustrated if something prevents me from following through with my original plan. What makes this even more challenging for me is that my boyfriend is the type to focus more on the past. I try to look forward toward our future while he reflects on memories. We all might reduce some of our stress and anxiety if we can learn to live more in the present and become less fixated on our vision for the future and those days that have long passed.

So now the question for my readers is, what is your personality type? If you’re an INFJ, too, were you able to relate to any of this? Feel free to share what your life experience has been like so far as an INFJ. It’s really nice hearing from similar minds since I don’t encounter them often enough. If you know any good websites, quotes, info, etc. for INFJs, please share those, too, in the comments section below.

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8 thoughts on “What is an INFJ?

  1. most of the above is me,but I tend to embrace the past more than the future,perhaps a little scared of what tomorrow brings.i am shy and reserved and I think I prefur the company of my dog to most people whom I think the world of

    • Well, I agree that the future can seem pretty scary at times! I can’t say I put too much focus on the past because I know we all have a tendency to remember only the good parts and forget all the bad stuff, but it’s great to reflect on the past to learn from mistakes. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being shy and reserved or preferring animals over people 🙂 Thanks for commenting!

  2. I’m an INFJ too, & virtually *everything* you’ve said resonates with me, but particularly the bit where you thought you were different types. For years I thought I was INFP, but have tested again recently & came out INFJ – which does make more sense to me!

  3. My twin sister (INFP) actually took the test, then told me about it – we debated my type a while, but in the end, couldn’t refute the fact that my personality traits within INFJ. And I relate to everything you’re saying, that feeling of isolation can be difficult. The judging + intuition parts of my personality can lead to overthinking things + over reactions, caused me anxiety + panic attacks. Yet these same mechanics to overthink things lead to me making connections and seeing patterns quicker + logically, people say I’m intelligent + insightful. The comic about the guy buying the girl a drink made me laugh as that’s exactly how I feel about friendships, and especially relationships.

    • Oh yes, the isolation and the tendency to overthink that you mentioned can be difficult to deal with at times. I like that you were able to put a positive spin on overthinking, and I think you’re right about INFJs being able to make connections others may not see. That comic is wonderful, and sometimes I think I should just show it to people whom I would like to be friends with so that they can decide if they’re prepared. It might scare off a few people, but that’s ok because I only want friends who are deep and genuine. I’m sure you know what I mean. Thanks for commenting, Judy!

  4. Hey you forgot to include ENFP… I have a best friend who is INFJ and a boyfriend who is also an INFJ.. Yes you are silent in many times but your are a very good communicator and I love talking to lot of things on you… Your sweet and intense and very good at seeing things others can not.. And lot of you are really smart ^^. That’s why I love being with you because I also love enjoying quiet time with you ^^

    • Sweet, intense, good at seeing things others cannot…Yep, that sounds like an INFJ! Glad to see that some people like you can recognize and appreciate our strengths 🙂 We’re prone to feeling deeply flawed and sometimes invisible, so it’s helpful to be reminded that we’re appreciated. Thank you!

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